1. So… you’re saying it’s raining in Scotland right now?
[ducks]
2. I just read a thing where apparently, the Blarney Stone in Ireland is related to the Stone of Scone in Scotland, the latter being basically the seat of the Scottish monarchy. Blarney seems to be a piece of Scone (okay, I’m tempted, but I won’t) gifted to Ireland by the Bruce after the Battle of Bannockburn (there’s room for another pun there, but… nah). First I’ve heard of this but, then again, I didn’t know about the Stone of Scone until sometime in the past four years, so I’m hardly the reliable source. If my source is correct, I’m sure I’ll hear about this again.
3. For the record, I do not agree with the recent political grandstanding by this organization‘s campaign Scotland is Now. I will always come down on the side of LGB rights and equality. No question there. But I refuse to support a movement that works against the rights of women and homosexual people and that targets children for poisoning and mutilation. You may do whatever you like with that information, and I in turn will respond appropriately if I don’t like what you do. Fair do’s.
And this is not “well you’re just some American fanny,” either — people in your own country agree with me, dear Scots. If you don’t know what’s going on, perhaps it’s time you listened to your most famous English resident. Oh, she’s not really Scottish either? These women are. Stop playing dumb.
It may seem silly and self-defeating for me to come out like this so early on, but I would rather not be followed by woman-hating, homophobic, delusional people in the first place. If I scare you all off now, I won’t have to do it later. So go on. Tell everyone how horrible I am. I’ll be over here continuing to enjoy myself. Ta.
(And now you know why the comments are turned off.)